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Joined 3 years ago
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Cake day: June 12th, 2023

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  • Maybe it’s to do with what a literal dogwhistle is. I can’t really make heads or tails of this, but that’s maybe just because my brain is on a completely different wavelength. Like dogs can hear specific frequencies humans can’t. Maybe trumpists hear certain things in between this word soup that actually makes sense on some level.

    Or maybe he’s just a senile old man and his followers are incapable of critical thought when it comes to him.




  • It sounds as though you have a very strong conceptual understanding of all of this and that urge to know ‘why’ is something that resonates. Putting it into practice always seems to be more difficult, especially when put on the spot and even moreso when someone is radiating a type of energy that will trigger your reflex that you are ‘in the way’ or otherwise being disagreeable. I find it helps to imagine just randomly anyone dealing with certain situations and trying to understand how and why they don’t face the same problems I do.


  • Specifically the part about the world going to shit triggered me a bit. Yes of course we all pretty much see that this might not end well. But I speak to my dad about this quite a bit and he feels there have been similar periods decades ago where everyone also felt the world was going to shit.the world has been going to shit for maybe hundreds of years and people in general are kinda awful.

    But in the meantime a lot of people are also doing great things. Their achievements are not usually shared because news sites can’t profit off of good news as much as of bad news.

    But the Debbie Downer attitude is really not something that is going to solve anything. Which I know, is not a nice thing to say because you genuinely have a point. We are not likely to solve any of the big issues at any type of social gathering so it’s better to keep grave conversations for the time and place, as you’ve indicated yourself. If you’re really so worried about what is going wrong in the world all the time and it’s all that occupies your mind, either find a way to live your life in such a way that you can say ‘it wasn’t me’ when things do go to actual shit before you die, or find a way to make a difference in the world somehow. And if you manage either but are still able to get a few laughs in on the weekend when hanging out with people you enjoy spending time with, I think you’ll have done the ultimate thing. If you only manage the latter, it’ll make your social life a bit easier.


  • I think if I project your story onto myself (I can relate), I usually judge myself the way I think others judge me. And spoiler alert: it’s never positive. I think at some point you will realise that pretty much anyone, either neorodivergent in some way or typical, is just living their life. Some people are the type to judge, some aren’t. Some will take your ‘excuse me’ and hear ‘well isn’t this person nice’ and respond with something more agreeable to you.

    Thing is you will never have a 100% match with everyone all of the time and you should really stop trying to, because it’ll make life considerably harder and more importantly, less enjoyable. You’ll be always walking in eggshells and pretty much never do right by others. Most people prefer you to be authentic rather than a pleaser. And the ones that don’t, well it’s okay to not form any connections with those. But if you shy away from anyone who imposes their will upon you and you’re happy just going along, you will also miss out on a lot of 85% connections that can be delightful.

    All in all I do agree with the most succinct comment here saying that the person in question was just a bit of a dick but keep in mind this guy is most likely not trying to be a dick. He’s just expressing himself in his own frame of reference and his own values. There is no implication saying you should follow any of that because most people aren’t layered like that, they have no intention on influencing your behaviour.

    I might say something along the lines of ‘you should care less about what others think of you’ because it’s what was told to me throughout my life. Gradually you might get there organically. Or you might not. I just wish for you to be comfortable in your own skin and be more accepting towards yourself so you can draw the conclusion that this guy was a dick by yourself.

    Keep on sharing and reaching out like this, it’s the best way to move forward and to grow as a human. Know that there are people in your corner.


  • I can say by just analysing the words and what they probably mean that I have 3, 4, 5 and 7, no doubt. Never been tested for autism but I’m fairly certain it’s in there.

    5 is only sound that I seem to process differently in the sense that I have very sensitive hearing and misophonia. Especially eating sounds cause high levels of stress for me.